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it's the start of mar. happy birthday ah-ma! goodbye to feb, 1/6 of the year has passed already, it's insane.

what do i say about feb 09? i think it has got to be one of the most emotionally draining months of my life ever but it's also one of the months which i've reflected the most. just to share a couple of thoughts i've had throughout the month:
1. expectations are evil. okay not really but expectations are a killer most of the time. we expect a certain amount out of ourselves, we expect things to happen and sometimes, we even have expectations of our friends. when our expectations aren't met, we feel sorely disappointed and crushed. when our expectations are met, we merely feel contended or worse still, we may feel that it's a given. i've learnt over these years that it's better to have lesser expectations. that way you don't feel let down 'cause you weren't even expecting anything in the first place. but sometimes, rountines create expectations unknowingly and of course, expectations do serve a good purpose which is to drive and motivate you. however, right now in my life, i'm better off without any expectations (especially none regarding results!)

2. sometimes our pride gets in the way. it hinders us from possibilities and no one is better than anyone else. in my opinion, it's just a matter of differences personality or character wise. first impressions are deceiving so we shouldn't judge someone till we really know them. even so, we still shouldn't judge. i know i'm guilty of judging people at times and i'm trying not to.

3. does it really get better or do you just bury it deeper? i heard this line on private practice and it's true how sometimes we just bury pain, we just don't want to face it, we run away from reality and basically escape instead of getting the wounds heal. i have an inkling that some others are facing this scenario as well. what i can say is that although things aren't looking bright, there's always light at the end of the tunnel (: